8 April 2002
The arrangements are pretty much all made.
My sister and her boyfriend will be making their way here tomorrow afternoon, and we will all travel to Heathrow, and then to Glasgow, and then home.
The undertaker, bless him, will come and collect us from the airport, which is a relief. I don't want to have to make small talk with taxi drivers, nor do I want to explain why I don't want to make small talk. It's not their fault they all know me because I've used their service so often, but I just can't really cope with that enforced joviality I always have to use.
Speaking of the undertaker, he's been absolutely amazing. I was a bit concerned about leaving my mum alone on Wednesday, but from the regular updates I've been getting, the inevitable paperwork has been expedited and handled with what amounts to relative ease.
My sister and I were asked if we wished to have our own floral arrangements, or whether we wished to have a joint arrangement with my mother. Both of us said we wished our own, and were given the choice of what we wanted. She asked for pink tipped carnations, or failing that, a mixture of white and pink carnations. I of course had to be different. I asked for three calla lilies tied with a white ribbon. Although it's not a common flower to be in stock at local florists, they went the extra mile, speaking to the florist, and so I got my wish.
For the order of service, they asked my mum for a photo of my dad, to go on the front cover. My dad was a very quiet and reserved man, who didn't particularly feel comfortable in front of a camera lens. So it made me very glad that I got a good photo of him, which my mum chose to be on the front cover, and I'm especially glad that I have it, so that I can remember him as he was, not as he was at the end.
The arrangements are pretty much all made, all that's left is for us to be there, and that will be the hardest task of all.
That's a great photo.
I was going to say the same thing - that's a beautiful photograph. I hope you find some peace at moments in the days & weeks to come...
As always, I will be thinking of you and yours. May you find peace in this trying time.
Stay strong!
You've got Dave + your family.
Enjoy your memories ++ think that things could have been much worse .... so.. count your blessings that your much loved 'Dad' didn't have to suffer too long.
Everyone will be thinking of you.
We ALL love you.
What a great photograph of your father! He looks very much like a kind and loving man in this photo. As tragic a loss as it is for the world to lose such a man, I hope you can find comfort in knowing that a kind and loving soul is watching over you.
You are in my prayers.
Ann - I've just come across your beautiful and inspirational site.
I've seen several fathers die, including my own. It wasn't until many years later that I realised how much grief can be a doorway to enrichment and depth. I'd like to share a poem with you I wrote some years ago - you can find it here:
http://www.thewatermanchronicles.co.nz/newzealand-poetry-poems-thefather.htm
Ann - love and good wishes, and thank you for sharing.
John
... the online home and (not very) alter(ed)-ego of Ann McMeekin, a recently freelance Web Accessibility Consultant.
... passionate about many things, most of which will turn up on this site at some time or other.
... contactable via email.
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