Who says politics can't be made more interesting?
Another guest post... this is almost turning into "Pixeldiva Presents" with your host D.
However, my reasons for commandeering the blog again are quite serious. As the title states, vibrating peripherals. Within the next few days (assuming she doesn't lose her nerve and cop out), Pixeldiva is going to get a force-feedback joystick.
(pause to let that sink in)
Right, can I just ask what a phallic-shaped vibrating lump of plastic adds to the gaming experience?! We are still talking about joysticks here remember.
I broke those twiddly little one-button things on early Spectrum Sinclair games, I snapped Kempstons on Elite, I twisted the hell out of a Logitech Wingman on TIE Fighter and most recently I've been fighting the Shivan invasion in Freespace 2 with my Sidewinder 2 (yes I know the Logitech Digital is a nicer stick overall, but it conflicted with the wireless keyboard and mouse, yes I was very sad and you can read all about it here)
Not one of these games would be enhanced by having the joystick try its very best to remove itself from my hand as I bank and thrust my way through dogfights. I don't need to have my arm shaken to remind me I'm being shot at and hit, I have EAX surround for that.
One area where I've witnessed FF enhancing a game was the steering wheel on games like Carmaggeddon and Midtown Madness and if you're a driving game fan then I'd firmly encourage shelling out for the setup over the non-FF version as this *is* something you'll experience when you drive around in real life.
Hands up everyone who's flown MiG 29's in real life? Comanche gunships? X-Wings?
Now, removing from the reading audience trained pilots and mental patients we have a grand total of none.
The expense isn't justified.
The reason behind this purchase is that the two of us played the I-War 2 demo and it looked utterly stunning. With real Newtonian physics and gorgeous graphics the game played like the space battles of Babylon 5, it isn't released until the 8th though and the idea of playing Elite style gameplay in Freespace 2 style graphics is just too appealing to miss.
In the meantime, I'll be playing Conflict: Freespace which turned up today after a successful ebay auction with my Microsoft Normal Sidewinder joystick. The world needs less gimmicks and more innovation.
Typical D chain of thought;
Pearl Harbor promotional campaign, hmm, I might watch that...
Hawaii 5-0 theme in head... dah-da-da-da-dahhh-da, dah-da-da-da-daaaah
Hated Hawaii 5-0, never enough action, so change to Magnum P.I. instead, waa-wa-wa-waah
Wonder if there are Magnum P.I. fansites out there... ooo, episode guides!
That house looks nice, wonder how much that cost...
What?!! I pay more than that to live in crummy London!
Considering that the previous entry has been sitting up here a bit too long now, and that it's a tad on the dodgy side and submitted by guest writers, here is a conversation over AIM between Pixeldiva and I from earlier today, a work colleague caught a glimpse of her webcam before I could change windows and the rest speaks for itself;
D: Vic says "Jennifer Lopez"
D: My question; Who did you *think* I was watching on the webcam on friday.
D: So there you go.
D: From a distance in a small window, you look like Jennifer Lopez.
PixelDiva: ohhhh
PixelDiva: cool
PixelDiva: i think :-)
D: What's not to feel flattered about there?!
PixelDiva: nothing I guess
PixelDiva: i'm just wondering if it's more okay for you to have been looking at me, or J-Lo :-)
D: Oh please, don't call her that, it's dumb.
D: You mean if I'd have got into more trouble for having a live feed to Jennifer Lopez?!
D: I think Vic would have torn my head off if it'd been in the way!
PixelDiva: heh
PixelDiva: i just wondered if you would get more or less "respect" for it being a star than just your boring old girlfriend :-)
D: I already told you I got respect for it. How likely would it be that I'd get to watch Jennifer Lopez live over the web from work?
PixelDiva: hehe
PixelDiva: but if you had... you'd have got more respect :-)
D: If I had I wouldn't be working in London!
D: I'd be living in the back of her shorts.
PixelDiva: LOL
D: Just snug down there, hibernating...
PixelDiva: ewww
PixelDiva: like bum fluff?
D: What? I reckon there's room for a small colony down there.
D: The bum fluff would be like... our cattle... we'd farm them...
PixelDiva: gross
D: And brand them depending on which ranch you were from...
D: There's be the Left Cheek Corral.
PixelDiva: you have *far* too much time on your hands today
D: And we'd fight off the red skins from cocix ridge...
PixelDiva: uh-huh
D: And maybe go down the mine shaft...
D: :-D
PixelDiva: eeeek!
D: I'd blog that if I wasn't so busy peeing myself with laughter...
PixelDiva: oh you would?
D: What? Living down Jennifer Lopez's butt cleft? That's not worthy of a silly blog?
PixelDiva: the mineshaft bit was a worry
D: Who knows what nuggets might be found down there...
D: Or up there depending on your orientation at the time...
PixelDiva: ewww
PixelDiva: this is just getting disturbing
D: I reckon we could make a mint mining J-Lo nuggets... we'd be hauling them out by the mule-load!
PixelDiva: now that's just gross
D: We'd have to be careful not to overmine though, wouldn't want those cheeks caving in over our heads...
D: Okay, I think I'm done with this mental image. I just imagined Jennifer's butt deflating like a soufflee
D: And no, I won't blog it, but I do want recognition for making the whole thing ridiculously funny and gross at the same time.
D: I mean the image of a mining town on J's crack with ranches and fluff-herds across her cheeks is just a bit... bizarre.
PixelDiva: yes, it is
PixelDiva: you're sick
Not only am I sick, but I guess this proves I was lying about not posting it. Whoops.
[PixelDiva isn't my actually AIM handle, btw, so please don't try and page it, cos you'll probably confuse and worry the person who beat me to it - ann]
It's amazing the conversations you can have on irc... in a channel set aside for disucssing the use of a particular 3d rendering package.
"Narrow minded people can see thorough a keyhole with both eyes at once"
"bit like gynacologist decorating the hall, stairs and landing through the letterbox of the front door"
"A gyno' is the only person who can change 4 spark plugs through the radiator grille"
(names have been removed to protect the guilty)
So, I'm in the town centre today, fighting my way through the hordes of bank holiday family groups with screaming kids, only barely resisting the urge to use my crutch for evil, when I walk past a chemist.
So, before I know it I'm standing in front of the Rimmel display, and I'm looking at nail polish. Although, to be exact, I'm looking for a top coat/strengthener. A quick look reveals that I can have: base coat and filler with strengthener in a charming shade of Pepto Bismol pink (altogether now: EWWWW!!), or I can have a green base coat/strengthener, or a blue something else (I forget now what it was - top coat and shoe polish?), or I can have a kinda purply 3 in 1 thing. So, being the inveterate bargain hunter my dad brought me up to be, I pick up the 3 in 1 thing.
So, while I'm picking this up, two other bottles catch my eye. One is a lovely dark irridescent bluey/greeny shade, and the other is a similar thing only in red/greeny/gold (sounds gross, is actually quite nice).
So, I pick these up too, because they're only 2.49 each and claim to be quick drying (altogether now: 60 seconds my arse!), and if they're crap, it doesn't really matter cos they're cheap. There's logic in there somewhere, just don't ask me where :)
So, I'm sitting here now, looking at these bottles in more detail, and I look at the names of the shades.
One is called "Mania" and the other is called "Zeitgeist".
Hmmmmm.....
P.S. I went for Mania. Because I couldn't get the top off my zeitgeist.
(there's a double meaning in that)
Tonight's Buffy: Wow.
From funny/disturbing to heartbreaking in less than an hour. I might not like how the storyline appears to be going (I'm sorry, but it's just wrong) I couldn't fail to be moved by the last scene.
If this is what it's like with three episodes to go...
I would like to make smartass comments about the links below, but truth be told, I'm too busy having hysterics.
Oh, to hell with it. Go here.
I'd just like to set a limit on the number of syllables allowed in single words used in this blog. See yesterday's post. Thankyou.
I'm having a bit of a strange day. I feel all discombobulated. I have a black background on my screen, and I can see the desk and keyboard reflected in the screen. I'm listening to Fisher, and finding that I'm almost hypnotised by the reflected movement of my fingers as I type. It's very odd. It doesn't seem like me.
To whoever it was that sent me that email.
I know you think you probably thought it was funny. It really isn't.
I'd really like it if you owned up to it and let me know who you were, because it doesn't seem to work properly in either of the browsers that I use, and I'm sure as hell not upgrading to IE 5.5 just for that. I'd rather not have to email the webmaster of the site to find out who you are, so please, just drop me a line and let me know.
Thanks.
*UPDATE*
The culprit has owned up. Which is a relief. A suitable retaliation will be sourced, you can be sure of that.
Ha! Capitalism lives to smirk another day!
Close thing though.
Came into work today amid builders removing chipboard, Niketown graffitied up with purple paint (at least they didn't burn it down, it's a nice building, shame about the occupants). Tottenham Court Road was pillaged by a mob of sixty hardcore anarchists. Bet that gave the six thousand cops something to worry about. Bit of stress-relief probably.
My workmates and I left our office around half two to avoid being locked in for the night and went to the safest nearby place. The pub. Nobody ever looted a pub during an anti-capitalism demonstration. There we sat for a few hours downing pints and watching live footage of what was going on five minutes away. We even got to watch Critical Mass cycle past en masse. The footage got boring after a while though and could easilly have just been a photo being held up to the camera, so pacified and inert were the demonstrators penned in at Oxford Circus.
Then, after being told that hordes of rioters were heading our way we took extra precautions. We got another round in. And a bag of peanuts in case they turned up hungry.
Leaving the pub however we ended up at Marble Arch, at the far end of Oxford "Flashpoint" Street and immediately took action. We went into another pub. They practically boarded up the entrance behind us so swish was the pub. Trapped inside we had no choice but to drink more pints and enjoy the food while watching it all live on BBC News 24 as the seething mass of total anarchists displayed their contempt for society by... standing perfectly still surrounded by police in riot gear, still trapped at Oxford Circus. Oh sure there were a few scuffles and break-throughs, but overall the trouble didn't start until the police, under heavy protest, let the protesters trickle out and head home.
Trouble was inevitable, however the degree of containment shown meant that the government and police forces proved their point. They could control the situation and did so during a seven-hour standoff, their organisation was stronger and better equiped and only cost the tax payers £3 million in extra wages.
Hold on... 6000 cops, a few hundred horses, petrol money... they brought their own helmets and shields... and this makes £3 million how? I guess capitalism's greatest enemy is capitalism itself.
D and friends hit the town.
Just for those who haven't realised, I've been allowing a guest writer or two to dip their toes in the blog pool before deciding whether or not they want to jump in.
Nothing major, just the odd post or two, as noted by the change of author at the bottom of the post, so don't worry if you think something's a bit odd, no need to adjust your monitor :)
Today's turning into a real anti-climax in the city of London. I came into work thinking I'd have to dodge rubber bullets (sunglasses and trench-coat optional) and run through clouds of CS gas and protesters a la start of Akira. But Nooooooooo, instead I cross Oxford Street looking like Chipboard city and walk past pairs of Boobies... uh, I mean Bobbies.
I get to the office and there's a new guy standing guard on the other side of the door. There I am, in my usual office get-up, jeans, trainers, sloppy fleece, messy hair, Red Alert 2 t-shirt with the American flag stripes with the Hammer and Sickle instead of the stars I reckonned could get me out of trouble from both sides of the conflict if I got caught in the middle.
And if that didn't work I'd either boast about my Paris education (to the cops) or swap bomb-making tips with the anarchists (no, no, *three* parts potassium nitrate to *two* parts sugar you spikey-haired knob-nose!)
Now safely in the office I can only imagine something out of Monty Python's Meaning of Life, like the corporate takeover at the start... fending off vegans with my ham sandwich, slashing at anarchists with a post-it pad (hey, those paper-cuts really hurt), throwing tipp-ex bottles with lit tissue fuses instead of petrol bombs and using my Corporate Summer 2000 free frisbie as a Xena Chakram, throwing with expert precision and knocking anarchists and rozzers flying.
To further spoil the fun we've been sent a mail saying we've all to go home before four. Which I suppose means I can go window-shopping this afternoon. Well, I could have if they weren't all boarded up.
Seriously, Nike Town, McDonalds and The Gap I can understand them boarding up their windows, they've had global campaigns run against them for years now and are prime targets... but Sock Shop?
"We need to destabalise the global economy!"
"Loot Sock Shop!"
Oh yeah, I bet they're top of Tyler Durden's list to cancel global debt.
Also, this themeing the day with a Monopoly-style is ludicrous. They'll all be fighting over who gets to use the car. Nobody will want to take the dog cause it's not something big and hard like a Dobberman or Alsation, it's a little Scottie Dog. People will be lucky to get out of Jail just by paying £50, and although there might be Free Parking all over the City today what good is it when you'll be going back to a burnt-out over-turned car that someone's taken a crap on?
So much for Reclaim the Streets. You're welcome to them.
... the online home and (not very) alter(ed)-ego of Ann McMeekin, a recently freelance Web Accessibility Consultant.
... passionate about many things, most of which will turn up on this site at some time or other.
... contactable via email.
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